What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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