yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
