Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Randomize
