so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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