your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
