I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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