I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
