you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Randomize
