new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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