So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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