girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
