There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
