WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
you never un-have a 4some
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