come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
