Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
