Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
