PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
