omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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