sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
