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• (917): View more from New York City

  your thong is hanging out like whoa

  Fav 2 2989 1569

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• (425): View more from Washington

  all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.

  Fav 6 3886 1255

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.

  Fav 8 4156 1166

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (408): View more from California

  The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.

  (408): View more from California

  You've ruined television for me.

  Fav 4 2837 1194

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• (714): View more from California

  You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.

  Fav 15 3956 1042

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?

  Fav 8 718 1723

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....

  Fav 7 2232 711

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.

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• 

  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (571): View more from Virginia

  A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place

  Fav 5 1609 592

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• (813): View more from Florida

  Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.

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• (281): View more from Texas

  Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.

  Fav 2 925 461

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes

  Fav 1 194 142

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