Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
not ubering you a puppy
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
