let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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