she was so not down for the gang bang
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
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