I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
