did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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