Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
