At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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