What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
