Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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