I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
