its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize