Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
