i permit you to call me
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
