I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize