so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
