I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
