i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
