Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
