The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
