dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
