he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I touched a dick in church today
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
