can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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