Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
