What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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