so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
