Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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