so explain again why im purple
no
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
