You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
