I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize