Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I think weed is turning my hair brown
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
