So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
