Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize